Published on July 13th, 2011 | by Pep0
Pep Talk: Rehab Edition
What’s going on people? Pep here with your Rehab edition of “PEP TALK” (music plays in the background.) This latest edition is coming out of London. Yes London—the place that has all the fancy bridges and dumb guards whose main mission in life is to have no thoughts while even dumber tourists try to make them laugh or smile.
But back to the Pep Talk. It was just a matter of time before this big headed heroin addict singer made it to the Pep talk. Mrs. Amy Winehouse, please take your face out of your own vomit and take this Pep Talk like you take a needle full of heroin; with gusto! You made it to the latest edition because of your latest act. Mrs. Winehouse was supposed to kick off her 12 stop European tour Saturday, which turned out to be an epic fail because by Tuesday the whole thing was canceled. There are various news reports stating she was stumbling around the stage and couldn’t even remember the lyrics to her songs during her first show on Saturday. This, of course, led up to her being heavily booed off stage.
It really sucks when great talent goes to waste. Mrs. Winehouse, your career could be so much more if you could just stop heating up the spoon and stop putting your nose on the table. If you could do that…maybe you could probably remember some of your own song lyrics and have a great tour. You already won 5 Grammys. If you can just form some words, place them with music in the background, you may win more. I am not a doctor but I think you might have to say yes to rehab yes yes yes.
Alright People that’s your Rehab edition of “Pep Talk” (music plays in the background.) Hopefully next time we don’t have to mention a place where soccer is the only relevant sport. I’m out and you know where to send your hate mail—right in DB’s inbox.